Category Archives: Funny

You know, my Mamaw, the preacher

Yep, that’s right.

My grandmother was a bonafide, ordained preacher of the Holiness Pentecostal faith.

She was also a die hard Democrat:) I’m pretty sure being a Pentacostal Preaching Democrat is an oxymoron—I’m just sayin’:)

She was very musically inclined, teaching herself to play the piano and guitar by ear.

She loved to sing.

Made the best damn coffee I’ve ever had.

Crazy ’bout Elvis:)

And she LOVED to laugh.

My Mamaw, the preacher.

She was a fire, hell, and brimstone preacher that could move you to salvation, no matter how many times you’d been saved before.

Many of my favorite childhood memories include her.

We use to sing together, all the time.

Our favorite song: “Had it Not Been”…

And while I do not personally believe many of the ways she did, I can’t help but think:

Had it not been for her, my entire family might have never heard the Gospel and might have never came into their own relationship with Christ.

My Mamaw, the preacher. For her, I am very thankful:)

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Transformers and Engineering

When the first Transformer movie made it’s debut a few years ago, my son wanted all of these transformer toys for Christmas. Coincidentally, this was also a Christmas where my husband was deployed, so I was on my own to shop and felt obliged to make up for his absence, so I bought them–all of them!  I bought Maximus Prime, Bumblebee, transforming airplanes, so many, I can’t even remember. The transformers come packaged, untransformed, so Bumblebee was a little yellow car, Maximus Prime was a diesel truck, etc. 

Christmas morning was awesome! My boy had them torn out of the package and onto the floor faster than you could blink! He loved them! He played with them a while before he transformed them into the walking versions of themselves. And then he had even more fun, as the pretend war he was having with them became action packed! He played for hours! 

And then we had a problem: 

Son: “Momma, I can’t get Bumblebee back into a car. Please help me”. 

Me: “Okay, give him here”. 

I start twisting and turning, pulling and yanking. I’d think I would have it, only to find a leg poking out or the head sticking up. I tried for what seemed like an eternity to get Bumblebee transformed into a car. My aggravation was magnified by the constant noises Bumblebee makes. I tried. I tried some more. My husband called in the midst of the events and I expressed my aggravation, thinking to myself “I wish you were here to do this”….

Total frustration was taking over my mind, lending determination with it. 

Son: “It’s okay. I will just play with him like this”. 

Me: “No, I will get it. Just give me a few more minutes”. 

My nails were in the way. Bumblebee was singing to me. I was trying not to break him…or throw him across the room. Beads of sweet were forming on my upper lip…

Son: “Momma, did you read the erections?”

Me: “What did you just say?”

Son: (enunciating every word) “DID-YOU-READ-THE-ERECTIONS?”

Frustration gone. Hysterical laughter ensued. 

Thank you, Jesus because I needed that one! 

My son thought I had lost it:)

And then I held the directions, that didn’t help by the way, and asked my son, one more time “what did you say these were?”. Yes, I did that. Don’t judge me! 🙂 And yes, I howled with laughter some more. 

Laughing is my favorite. 

The packaging of Transformers should include a disclaimer: *engineering degree required to reassemble.